*A Real Pain* explores the unique dynamic of how we can grow closer through a shared loss. David (played by Jesse Eisenberg) and Benji (played by Kieran Culkin) reinvest in their relationship with each other through a tour to commemorate their grandmother’s legacy. // *Image: Searchlight Pictures*

Airports are strange. On the surface, they’re just a place we go to get to another place. People come and people go to get to whatever part of the world they need to get to, and yet airports are often host to some of the most emotionally memorable moments in our lives. Whether they’re moments of grief, instances of joy, confessions of love, or final goodbyes, so much of people’s lives are out in the open in the airport. It’s a crossroads of thousands of stories, intersecting at a singular point. It’s a place where we can see the direction in other peoples’ lives, or lack thereof.

A Real Pain, Searchlight Pictures’ latest release directed by Jesse Eisenberg, begins and ends with Benji, played by Kieran Culkin, observing people in this setting. He begins observing others while he waits for David, played by Jesse Eisenberg, to arrive at the airport. After switching to David’s perspective, we immediately see a clash in their personality types. David leaves multiple voicemail messages for Benji, asking his cousin to call him back after he gives updates on traffic to the airport, the sudden lack of traffic to the airport, and so on. It’s a quick montage, but it tells us everything we need to know about David - he’s an anxious man that nervously requests order but seldom gets it - at least when he’s asking for it from Benji.

Indeed, we learn that Benji has been at the airport for hours before David gets there a few hours before their flight to Poland. Benji claims that he’s been watching people, claiming that you get to see some wild stuff at the airport. That interest in watching others experience their lives is a profound way of quickly communicating about Benji’s character. Benji is frantic and oftentimes chaotic, immediately causing a nervous friction between him and David, who clearly doesn’t know how to deal with Benji’s many outbursts throughout the film. But behind the initial layer of chaos, wit, and energy of Benji’s character is a somber, introspective quietude, one that seeks direction and looks towards others to find it - even if that includes strangers.

In just a few minutes, A Real Pain delivers two vastly different characters that are going to navigate an adventure of connection, grief, and rebuilding a relationship that has changed over the course of the two cousins’ lives. Time changes relationships - we quickly learn that David and Benji’s relationship is one that has changed drastically since their childhood. David has a successful career, a wife, and a child that clearly take a large priority in his life as he watches videos of his kid on his phone and often calls his wife. Meanwhile, Benji doesn’t have nearly as much going on in his life - more than that, he’s clearly affected by the recent loss of Benji and David’s grandmother, who is mentioned to have been a significant mentor and pillar of support for him. The two cousins lead radically different lives despite having once been practically joined at the hip. Adulthood has created distance in their relationship with each other - but through grief and the desire to find resolve and direction in their lives amid the loss of a loved one, David and Benji’s relationship is one that is bound to grow closer through this trip to Poland they embark on. That adventure leads to a powerful journey that expertly blends comedy, chaos, and emotion in a way that any movie enthusiast deserves to watch unfold.

A primary theme of *A Real Pain* is that of grief, as we see cousins David and Benji confront the loss of their Holocaust-surviving grandmother through going on a Holocaust tour in Poland. *A Real Pain* understands the weight of its characters’ grief while believably injecting humor and heart throughout this tour. // *Image: Searchlight Pictures*

A Real Pain’s greatest strength is the chemistry and camaraderie that Eisenberg and Culkin share throughout this grieving process. David seems content with acknowledging that his relationship with Benji has changed due to them growing older and having more responsibilities, but Benji insists that their relationship can just go back to the way it used to be. Distance versus closeness. Order versus chaos. Introversion versus extroversion. David and Benji represent differing characteristics and perspectives that create constant conflict and tension between the two, which makes for great laughs and character moments. When the two cousins meet the other members of the Holocaust tour that they will be roaming Poland alongside, we see just how much David feels like he has to apologize for Benji being who he is.

Benji often interjects other people’s words, he’s vulgar, and he often says things that are unpredictable. David wants so desperately to reel that in and be more socially presentable to the others in the group, yet by the end of the tour, we see that Benji, despite all of the friction and awkward moments he introduces throughout the tour, he ends up leaving a larger emotional impact on the group. He receives hugs from most of the tour members, including the tour guide, while David just gets passing remarks and waves as he departs the group later in the film. David is, by comparison, more plain than Benji, and every character throughout the film treats him as such. That is, except for Benji.

Benji sees no reason for the distance that’s grown between him and David over the years to persist. He just wants to spend time with his cousin, get into deep conversations with him, and feel like he belongs with his family. It’s through embracing his own values and emotions that Benji is able to grieve the loss of his grandmother. David, meanwhile, doesn’t appear to need the grieving nearly as much as his cousin - but he views the very bonding between himself and his cousin to be an essential part of Benji’s grieving process. The tour they go on together throughout the film is about more than just learning about their grandmother’s experience of surviving the Holocaust and what Jews experienced in Poland during that time - the tour is about overcoming the hardship of losing a loved one through bonding together and reclaiming at least a little bit of the close connection that David and Benji once shared.

And what’s a better way to build up your connection with someone than to reminisce over better days? Some of A Real Pain’s best moments feature our two leads reflecting on memories they share - or rather, the differences on how they recall the same experiences. It’s through these instances that we finally get underneath David’s shell and we see him for the person that Benji knows that he truly is. It’s a convincing expression of character writing, in that David is someone that most other characters as well as the audience don’t think much of, but Benji helps unveil to the audience just how much David puts on a face in front of others.

In one of the most powerful scenes in the film, David apologizes to the other members of the tour after Benji brazenly and disgustingly exits the dinner table. What follows is a confession that David takes medication for OCD because of how many thoughts that he has to keep inside, while Benji constantly lets all his thoughts out into the open. David goes on to confess that he loves, hates, resents, and aspires to be like Benji all at once. He wants to be as openly emotional as his cousin, but views the world as a place that isn’t welcoming of such behavior. David feels as though he has no choice but to suppress his views and his emotions for the sake of others. This, in turn, makes him feel more alone and isolated.

This is illustrated well in a scene prior to this moment, where David and Benji are walking near a woman that’s on the tour. She’s beside herself and looks forlorn. David assumes that she wants to be left alone, with Benji replying “no one wants to be alone”. He fights David’s reservations and talks with the woman. It’s a small moment, but by embracing his thoughts and emotions, Benji ends up building a connection with the woman, understanding more about her perspective, her feelings, and her life story. From a distance, David wants this - he wants to have the strength to understand others as easily as Benji, but he feels like he can’t.

The two cousins view their relationship with grief and expression differently, and that’s what gives A Real Pain an authenticity to it. Despite their different approaches towards expressing themselves, David and Benji share a connection that is as combative as it is complementary. The two spend various moments on rooftops smoking weed and reminiscing over how their lives used to be, which sometimes leads into arguments about why they’ve chosen to live as far away from each other as they have, both emotionally and physically. The tone of these moments is often tender and sometimes hostile, but it always remains believable and heartful.

Kieran Culkin’s chaotic performance as Benji is often unpredictable but earnest - that’s what makes his few but meaningful quiet moments in the film hit even harder to the audience. // *Image: Searchlight Pictures*

A Real Pain finds a great balance in managing some of its heavier subject matter with playful dialogue that puts the audience in a position where they’re constantly learning about characters and how they interact with the world around them. The film recognizes the power behind some of its more meaningful imagery, such as the concentration camp they visit as part of the Holocaust tour and when they celebrate the Jewish custom of leaving stones on a grave. Thanks to smart direction, the film knows when to lean on its comedic writing and when to pull back and let the emotion and power characters’ grieving speak for themselves.

What helps accompany this is an excellent score entirely featuring piano pieces that help give the entire film a minimalist flavor to it. Hand-in-hand with this music accompaniment is a quick 90-minute runtime that forces the movie to have a strong pace, which prevents the film from taking too long to say what it’s trying to say about how grief can reignite relationships. And the message about the power of bonding in the wake of losing another is really what gives A Real Pain its heart. Few movies explore this experience as succinctly and genuinely as A Real Pain, and a large part of what makes the depiction of this bond work so well always comes back to the authentic, strained-yet-resilient relationship between David and Benji. The expressive performances and smart writing highlight how opposite from each other our two lead characters are - and yet their shared care for each other shines through more than anything else. Through a script that masterfully balances chaotic discomfort and quietude, A Real Pain makes for one of the best film experiences of the year.

A Real Pain ends with our characters returning to the airport. Just as he did at the beginning of the film, Benji sits beside himself as he watches others experience the many feelings that an airport hosts. The expression in his eyes in this final scene tell us everything about Benji’s journey - his grieving process is complete and he’s finally able to envision a future that he couldn’t when we last saw him in the airport. In this quiet moment, A Real Pain puts an exclamation point on its commentary on how bonding with those we love can help empower us to get through the other side of the grieving process as a stronger person. In this busy airport, Benji has achieved that.

Airports are strange, because seeing such a profound moment in the film’s final shot take place in an airport feels remarkably poignant. It feels right. It feels like the perfect way for A Real Pain to finish its mission and extends an invitation to the audience to move towards the future, just as Benji has gained the strength to do.

Final Grade: A

Thank you very much for reading! What are your thoughts on A Real Pain? As always, join the conversation and let me know what you think in the comments, on Bluesky @DerekExMachina, or on Twitter/X @DerekExMachina.