"Exhibiting Forgiveness" Review: Exceptional Emotional Examination of Trauma, Hatred, and Forgiving without Forgetting
Exhibiting Forgiveness is Titus Kaphar’s feature directorial debut that tells a semi-autobiographical story centered around artist Tarrell (played by André Holland, left) encountering his abusive father for the first time in his adult life. The film analyzes the process of navigating this situation in a realistic yet raw manner that honors the complexity and pain of its subject matter. // Image: Roadside Attractions
For better and for worse, trauma shapes who we are and informs our present. Oftentimes, we transform into the current version of ourselves in spite of the hardships we go through. Regardless of how trauma has impacted your life, one vital aspect of grieving for the pain we’ve experienced and moving forward is that of remembrance. When we go through such transformative experiences that meld us into the person we become, it’s impossible to simply forget about the memory of that experience. When we’re confronted by those that have wronged us and they’ve tried to convince us of their growth, can that truly be enough for us to forgive how we’ve been wronged? Does forgiving the person who inflicted such trauma onto us fix anything? Would it make us feel any better about ourselves and the path we’ve taken in life? Or is choosing to forgive something you previously thought was unforgivable a pointless endeavor?
This is the primary conflict that Exhibiting Forgiveness explores. Titus Kaphar’s feature directorial debut tells an emotionally raw yet realistic portrayal of a broken father-son relationship - one that is informed by Kaphar’s own experience with his father. The film opens with its protagonist Tarrell, played by André Holland, as he paints in his studio. We center on a painting of a man where we fade into the man whom this painting is a depiction of. His physical appearance tells the audience everything they need to know - he’s a downtrodden man sitting beside a convenience store with visible guilt and pain in his eyes. This man is La’Ron, masterfully played by John Earl Jelks. La’Ron witnesses a robbery happen at the convenience store, to which he shortly then sees a young boy in the car, the significance of which we’ll talk more in depth about later on.
We then center back on Tarrell’s perspective, where we quickly learn that he’s a man haunted by his childhood traumas. We only see brief glimpses of his past, but it becomes clear to the audience that he has PTSD, evidenced by him nearly choking in his sleep. He’s quickly awoken by his scared wife, Aisha, played by Andra Day. After being shaken awake, Tarrell physically recovers in his bed while Aisha emotionally recovers. It becomes clear that Tarrell has no interest in getting help for this as he welcomes his son, Jermaine, with open arms, acting as if nothing had just happened.
We switch back to La’Ron’s perspective as we see him get brutally injured from his altercation with the robber at the convenience store. He barely manages to take refuge at his brother, Michael’s house. When Michael’s wife gets home, it becomes immediately clear that La’Ron’s presence isn’t wanted. Indeed, this isn’t the first time that La’Ron has taken refuge here. As Michael and his wife continue talking, we learn just how much La’Ron has relied on others to get back on his feet, only to repeat the cycle months down the line. While the language they use dodges the word itself, it’s clear from their conversation that La’Ron is an addict - one that looks to have lived most of his life being crippled by the effects of addiction. That pain and guilt we saw in La’Ron’s eyes at his character’s introductions only cement this in the audience’s minds. La’Ron is evidently an addict that cyclically puts strain on his relationships - often turning to his brother, the only person left that won’t turn him away. But in an effort to give his brother shelter, Michael finds a basement for La’Ron to live in. The only catch: La’Ron needs to accompany the landlord to chapel everyday. This, in conjunction with the fact that the landlord has an clear-as-day strict temperament, puts La’Ron in a new situation - one where he’s guided by faith to reform his life.
We switch one last time to Tarrell, whose perspective we follow for the remainder of Exhibiting Forgiveness. We see that Tarrell, after having completed a successful art exhibit, is instantly encouraged by his agent to put together another exhibit after seeing what he’s been working on - a collection of paintings depicting his childhood. Tarrell promptly declines, insisting that his paintings still have a long way to go before being finished. As his agent leaves, we see a quiet sorrow fill Tarrell’s eyes as he looks at the paintings he’s created. This subtlety in expressing emotion and trusting the audience to connect the dots between this sorrow and the painting’s likely connection to the trauma that incited Tarrell’s panic attack from earlier is what swiftly sets Exhibiting Forgiveness above most films released this year. From not even halfway through its first act, Kaphar does a masterful job at communicating the complex emotional states of this story’s characters while leaving room for the audience to connect the dots themselves. This strength of the film only becomes more pronounced as we see the conflict escalate between Tarrell and his eventual reunion with his father, La’Ron.
After promising to help his mother prepare to move houses, La’Ron arrives at his mother’s house before spotting one of Exhibiting Forgiveness’ most meaningful recurring images - that of the young boy that La’Ron looked at during the film’s opening moving a painting across the sidewalk. The painting, which shows Tarrell’s depiction of his memories, briefly finds itself placed directly in front of his mother’s house - a memory overriding reality. It’s a poignant reminder of how our past experiences inform our current reality - a phenomenon that defines Tarrell’s self-expression as an artist and as a person. Shortly after meeting with his mother, Tarrell is surprisingly confronted by his La’Ron - his father who we immediately learn by Tarrell’s body language to be the source of Tarrell’s deeply-seeded trauma. Tarrell is now face-fo-face with a La’Ron that claims to have changed for the better. Joyce, Tarrell’s mother, insists that La’Ron’s claims of having changed are true - but Tarrell doesn’t see the situation as one where he can suddenly look past the hardship brought about by his addict father. In fact, Tarrell only delves further into a rage as he asks his mother why she would even entertain the idea of inviting La’Ron back into her life after everything he put her and Tarrell through. Despite the pain that the audience has yet to see themselves, Joyce has chosen to forgive La’Ron - believing in the work he’s done to change for the better.
Tarrell doesn’t accept this, but this interaction does set the foundation for he and La’Ron to interact with each other more in the future. Their following interactions are ones that showcase the brilliant acting capabilities of André Holland and John Earl Jelks, as well as impeccable, emotion-driven writing. As soon as Tarrell and La’Ron have a recorded conversation with each other that involves La’Ron explaining why he previously behaved the way that he did, Exhibiting Forgiveness transforms into an incredible character study that boldly explores the dynamic of a shattered family relationship and whether forgiveness is even possible.
Tarrell (played by André Holland, left) and La’Ron (played by John Earl Jelks, right) have conversations that make up an exceptionally strong emotional core to Exhibiting Forgiveness. Tarrell’s hatred towards his father gradually gets reframed as he learns more about La’Ron’s upbringing. That doesn’t take away or excuse the pain caused by La’Ron, though. // Image: Roadside Attractions
La’Ron is a man that was raised by a father that was far more abusive than he. While that doesn’t excuse the fact that La’Ron continued a cycle of abuse that he was once a victim of, it certainly contextualizes it to Tarrell. La’Ron goes on to explain that he got addicted to crack cocaine because he tried to prevent a family member from continuing to use it - only to delve into a decades-long addiction that would cause practically all of his relationships to disintegrate. La’Ron worked odd jobs just to make as much money as he could so he could get more of the drug he had become addicted to. Is it easy to sympathize with such a thing? The kneejerk answer to that question is, yes, but in truth, sympathy is more complicated than that. We can feel sorry for and understand why people become addicts. We can feel sorry for how that addiction negatively affects their life. Addiction is a hardship that many of us face in one way or another - what earns you sympathy among others is the action or inaction that you take in the face of that struggle. La’Ron’s addiction to crack is a tragedy, but his lack of desire to end that tragedy brought about unneeded pain upon others. For a long time, La’Ron chose not to be rid of his addiction - and his relationships with others, including his own wife and son, deteriorated because of that inaction.
It’s been over fifteen years since the last time La’Ron and Tarrell have seen each other. Maybe it’s too late, but La’Ron has finally chosen to take that long-needed action. La’Ron going to chapel at the demand of his landlord allowed him to find faith - and that faith is what led him to growing to become a stronger person with more integrity. Faith has served as La’Ron’s avenue towards rehabilitation. Whether you’re religious or secular, finding a community or something to believe in can be enough to make you feel more hopeful about the world. It can make you feel like you belong and have a purpose in the world. That’s certainly what faith has given La’Ron. However, as great as it is that La’Ron has found peace with himself, that still doesn’t excuse him of his past. The inaction that La’Ron had taken in the past has consequences that have negatively affected Tarrel throughout his entire life - being a faithful man of integrity doesn’t remove that all of a sudden. And so, in this instance, should La’Ron be forgiven by his son? Is such a thing possible? In the light of learning this, Tarrell refuses to believe that he can ever forgive La’Ron for how he treated Tarrell and Joyce during his childhood.
One of the most striking sequences from the excellent scene between Tarrell and La’Ron features a conversation of La’Ron’s relationship with his father. La’Ron mentions a story featuring his own trauma where his father pulled a gun on him and his mother. Tarrell is horrified by this anecdote, but is perhaps equally abhorred by the fact that La’Ron seems to downplay the significance of such a thing. “Everyone has flaws,” La’Ron says. It’s a twisted perception of a traumatic memory, and yet, it contextualizes why La’Ron treated Tarrell so brutally when he was a child - brutality was simply what he understood fatherhood to be. He didn’t know any better. His own trauma, whether knowingly or not, carried onward generationally because of La’Ron’s inability to recognize that the trauma brought about by his father wasn’t acceptable.
Exhibiting Forgiveness excellently explores the humanity of its characters when most movies in its position wouldn’t. Typically, it’s easy to paint an abusive character as someone that’s irredeemable. Maybe they’re sympathetic to some extent, but ultimately, their decisions are ones that are inexcusable. Lesser movies would opt to turn the characters of Tarrell and La’Ron into a black-and-white contrast, where one character has far more integrity and likability than the other. But like life, Exhibiting Forgiveness shows us through its two very different characters that it isn’t that simple. Tarrell and La’Ron are both flawed characters in different ways - what primarily sets them apart, though, is that Tarrell is able to recognize that his childhood trauma wasn’t acceptable. And through that knowledge, he is empowered to end his family’s cycle of traumatic father-son relationships.
Despite this, though, Tarrell leaves the conversation still outraged at La’Ron and everything he represents. As much as La’Ron and Joyce try to convince him otherwise, Tarrell still sees the flawed, abusive, addicted man in La’Ron and can’t bring himself to have any kind of relationship with him. This leaves La’Ron frustrated, but Joyce reminds La’Ron that relationships aren’t easy. “You’re the hardest working man I’ve ever met…except when it comes to relationships.”
Afterward, a pivotal scene begins shifting the tide in the progression of Tarrell’s relationship with La’Ron. After having another panic attack in his sleep, Tarrell wakes up in an outrage. He stands up from the bed and punches the wall in a small motel room, scaring his wife and, more vitally, his son Jermaine. While Tarrell was previously able to hide his trauma from Jermaine, he has now shown it in plain sight for his son, and the result has scared Jermaine. The young boy holds onto his mother as he looks towards his father in fear. Tarrell apologizes for punching the wall and asks for his son’s forgiveness. Jermaine remains by his mother’s side.
It’s a small moment, but this encapsulates how easy it is for this cycle of traumatic relationships to continue. Tarrell has but a small moment of rage, but it’s one that could stick in Jermaine’s memory throughout his life. It could negatively affect their relationship and there could be no turning back to how things used to be. Tarrell seeks forgiveness from his son because he acknowledges the potential fear he’s instilled into his son. Unlike with La’Ron, it isn’t too late for Tarrell to continue being on good terms with his son - after all, Tarrell has recognized the potential pain he has inflicted almost immediately unlike La’Ron. But Tarrell learns in this scene that he is not as dissimilar to La’Ron as he wants to believe. Like La’Ron before him, Tarrell’s fatherhood is informed by his perception of fatherhood when he was younger. Tarrell wants to be everything that La’Ron wasn’t - but both men’s relationship with fatherhood are eerily similar to each other. Maybe not enough to let Tarrell to forgive La’Ron, but perhaps enough to finally understand him.
Tarrell often sees his paintings in front of important locations throughout the film as they’re being moved by his younger self, symbolizing that he can never forget the past. Exhibiting Forgiveness is a phenomenal showcase of the complex emotions of confronting forgiveness towards others, but never forgetting the hardship others have brought upon you. // Image: Roadside Attractions
After only seeing glimpses of Tarrell’s past, we finally get to see the traumatic memories that Tarrell has with his father. We see the young boy seen by La’Ron during the film’s opening scene at the convenience store and learn that that young boy is, in fact, a young Tarrell. In order to raise money to buy drugs to feed his addiction, La’Ron bring Tarrell to do dirty work, refusing to acknowledge the medical and emotional needs of his son. This causes a bloodied Tarrell to drag himself home, to the horror of his mother. This causes a fight to break out between La’Ron and Joyce, resulting in La’Ron physically assaulting Joyce - the very source of Tarrell’s traumatic relationship with his father. The placement of this flashback in the film - being at the end of the film’s second act - is remarkably thoughtful, as it allows the audience to have the context of how this memory has caused Tarrell to behave throughout his life after this memory takes place. Moreover, we see the contrast now between who La’Ron is in the present, and who he was in the past, which, up to this point, we’ve only learned about through dialogue. Now that the film finally shows us just how traumatic La’Ron was towards Tarrell, it suddenly feels far more real. Talking about trauma and seeing it firsthand are two different experiences. Exhibiting Forgiveness creates a type of distance from the subject of trauma up until this point. Choosing to present the memory this way serves the film quite well - as most of the film is dedicated in exploring the aftermath and consequences of this memory. Seeing the memory firsthand when we do allows us to understand how powerfully this memory has affected Tarrell, while also understanding how things have changed since this has happened, both from Tarrell and La’Ron’s perspectives.
Moreover, the revelation that the young boy from earlier in the film is a younger version of Tarrell gives further meaning to the film’s opening. When La’Ron looked towards a young Tarrell at the convenience store during the film’s opening, he was truly looking at a face that wanted and deserved better from him. This shows us that La’Ron knows that he let his family down because of his addiction, he knows the pain that he has caused because of the past. But remembering the face of his son is what sets in motion the events that led to his rehabilitation. Indeed, the memory of his son and the desire for him to have gotten a better childhood is exactly what inspires La’Ron to become a better man. It’s a small touch, but it’s a detail that helps the film feel far more rounded and thoughtful.
The film’s final act sees Tarrell and La’Ron seeing each other at Tarrell’s art exhibit that was advocated for by his agent during the film’s first act. This exhibit - the namesake of the film - features various paintings that depict Tarrell’s life and childhood, including paintings of his mother, the places where he grew up, and a painting featuring half of his father’s face. In an emotional confrontation, Tarrell confesses to La’Ron that he can forgive him for what he’s done in the past, but he can’t forget the pain and trauma that it has brought him. Tarrell simply wants to move forward with his life, and as such, he refuses to have a relationship with his father moving forward. He understands his father more than he used to, and perhaps that understanding can be used to further inform how he treats his son. Maybe that understanding can prevent future situations where Tarrell briefly scares his son. There’s power in attaining that understanding, which both Tarrell and La’Ron recognize. But, through it all, Tarrell can still never accept a reality where he has a relationship with La’Ron. And so, the two men go their separate ways. The ending of the film is a hopeful, but bittersweet one. Both Tarrell and La’Ron exit the film as men with more integrity and understanding of one another, but the pain of the past can’t be erased. Some traumas can be coped with and some broken relationships can be mended, but Tarrell and La’Ron’s relationship simply isn’t one of those mendable relationships. And that’s okay.
That’s what makes Exhibiting Forgiveness such a powerful film. It navigates these endlessly complex topics of trauma, problematic parental relationships, and rehabilitation in a manner that’s raw, believable, and honest, and yet doesn’t undercut the fact that sometimes, fixing certain relationships isn’t possible. The film refuses to glorify the idea that any trauma can be overcome through understanding, but rather, that the power of understanding and growth are limited. Understanding the pain of the past can’t always fix the relationships broken in the past, but it can strengthen and protect the relationships of the present and future. Tarrell’s relationship with his son is one that’s still positive - one that can prove to be leagues greater than the father-son relationship that Tarrell had - but that relationship requires effort and an understanding of the source and context for the pain that Tarrell experienced as a child.
While I’ve mentioned the excellent performances on display as well as the emotionally intelligent writing, I must also give special praise to the film’s excellent soundtrack and use of music throughout its runtime. Aisha, Tarrell’s wife, is a musician that writes and records a song throughout the film. The song is performed at a pivotal point in the film’s narrative, and the lyrics perfectly encapsulate the themes of the film. It’s one of the strongest uses of music that I’ve seen in a movie all year.
Exhibiting Forgiveness is an emotional adventure that smartly and gracefully investigates how the broken relationships of the past can inform the new relationships we build in the future. This film excellently reveals information to its audience in a way that humanizes the very real pain experienced and brought about by its characters in honest, profound way. This film’s theme of our past experiences informing how we navigate the present and future is one that will doubtlessly age beautifully. Exhibiting Forgiveness fully showcases complex relationships and topics, and highlights that such complicated questions don’t have easy answers, but they do bring understanding. And that understanding is what empowers us and informs a better tomorrow. Exhibiting Forgiveness is a painful, but hopeful movie - a combination emblematic of its complex, often contradictory characters - and its that hope that makes this film an essential watch for anyone who has ever looked to the past to inform their decisions of the present.
Final Grade: A
Thank you very much for reading! What are your thoughts on Exhibiting Forgiveness? What are your thoughts on themes about how the past informs the future? As always, join the conversation and let me know what you think in the comments, on Bluesky @DerekExMachina, or on Twitter/X @DerekExMachina.
